I love this. It's a trick card. Manipulated by your loved ones and overplayed to the point it has become dog-eared and needs replacement. Allow me to try replace this cornerstone of arguments for you if you will. A selfish person is defined in most cases as someone who doesn't look after the needs of others. They are self-centred and self absorbed. Depression is a selfish disease. One can get so wrapped up in their own affairs that everything else can seem really unimportant compared to their own suffering. That being said, the best cure for depression is to get over yourself, I think. Spend some time outdoors. Out of yourself or out of your head... not in the drunken or drug addled states, Incidentally. Just out of your obsessive thinking brain and get into life, into everything else that is actually going on.
Anyway, Selfishness is defined as looking after No.1 only. That's right. No.1 only.
So don't you hate when someone calls you selfish because you aren't thinking of them? You know when they suggest that you should be thinking of them all the time.You know when they are demanding that you pour attention on them? Correct me if I'm wrong, but that is selfish. Demanding that I divert my attention for your sake. I was always a firm believer that if something doesn't gain your attention naturally via care, respect and charity etcetera it generally wasn't worth caring about. Every day you see thousands pass charity workers who beg for attention on the streets and these could be classed as "Selfish". By the way, there is nothing more irritating than someone who demands that you care about the same things they do.
Now, you might be thinking that "someone has to pay these charities in order to help the starving children of the world". Tell me this: Are you paying them? Do you walk by them on the streets with excuses like "Sorry, I'm in a rush" or "Not today"? You are selfish, by the popular definition. Sorry about that pal, no double standards allowed.
Of course, I would be first to admit that by the popular, over-used definition, I too am selfish. But I'm not a traditionalist nor do I claim to be. I don't claim to live by standards set by men of old so I don't go much by outdated doctrines or definitions. I might be a number of terrible things according to the holy bible, for example. It doesn't interest me. But this is what I'm talking about, people who live by old ways and act by modern ways. Where are you living? In the ideal world in your head or the real world? I think most are living in two worlds if you ask me. They hold tight to old definitions but blatantly flaunt them for their own benefit.
So you don't give to charity, but you aren't selfish. I don't either. You give what you can when you can. That is cool, because I do that too. Yet I am selfish because I wasn't thinking about you but you aren't selfish because you think that I should be thinking about you. It doesn't add up. The last time I checked, I'm pretty sure I was born as one person. I might kinda understand how a twin or an IDENTICAL twin might think that the other twin should be thinking of them, but I cannot understand how anyone else, close or otherwise should expect you to be thinking about them. This, is my confusion over selfishness. I myself am selfless to a fault at the best of times. I buy people drinks and food. I give away money to homeless people. (The last time I checked, this was the definition of charity, sorry one of the definitions of charity that is seen) I often go without the last piece for the benefit of someone else. Yet somehow paradoxically I am selfish because I wasn't thinking about you. Pat yourself on the back there. Go on. You deserve it. Then nuzzle up to your double-standards when you go to sleep because you are obviously very comfortable with them. You only care about selfishness when it suits you.
That is selfish.