Change Part 1

Change is very strange.

We're all conservatives at heart, every last one of us. We hate change, only because we don't change ourselves.

What we do change is usually cosmetic... Clothes, hairstyles, facial hair, skin (tattoos, tan) and even our body shape. But our personalities never change. Some of us like certain things that make us feel comfortable and happy and naturally, we clash with other's whose interests are different to our own. Actually, sometimes people who are the complete opposite to us can compliment our own personalities very well and some will feel "completed" by this. I guess that's where the old saying "opposites attract..." comes from. Sometimes difference is just as important as identity, it seems.

Some folks would be inclined to put up the argument "Ahhh, but you cannot change an alcoholic or junkie"

Alcoholics and junkies are either victims of circumstances, bad judgement or background, usually. I doubt you'll ever talk to an alcoholic or junkie who actually wants to be one. Some say there is a lack of awareness there, but I don't think there is. I think the awareness is just focused on the wrong area, generally. People who are unfortunate enough to be in these circumstances usually are aware of their inner problems more than the substances they are using to virtually or temporarily block them out with. They want to change the problem, rather than the person who is dealing with it. But you cannot, as I say, change the person who is dealing with it, only the attitude you have towards the problem.

So even the most freely liberal thinker will be subject to some sort of conservative attitude. We hate things being different to what we're used to. But we do get bored and then we want to change our surroundings and go abroad, or even others to suit ourselves. We never want to change ourselves to suit others. And why should we? Remember, it's not the personality that changes, only the attitude.

It's great to have some friends who never change. They are not rigid, but flexible. They appreciate difference and diversity. They appreciate that not everyone is the same as them. No one is, we are all different in some way. So we bugger off for a few years, come back and they are still the same. It is in strangers that we find the true value of those friends we already have. We know, because they don't change, that we can always come back to them. I am a person who needs a lot of change in my life, so it's nice to know that I have friends who never will. I'm sure they know I won't change either. I mean, issues are issues, but the person dealing with them never changes, just their attitude towards it. Sometimes the answer isn't always right on your doorstep either, so it's necessary to open your mind and broaden your horizons I think. This is not something that can be taught, but something that has to be learned or realised. You know that feeling when you want to break out of the mould or routine? That is change. Change WANTS to happen.

Some of us punish the ones we love because change so badly wants to happen to us. We want others to suit ourselves, our dreams and ideals. You have to experience a sensory awareness of the real world and the vastness and diversity of human beings to appreciate what you already have and what you can actually achieve from your dreams about this life. We can only do what our hearts tell us to do really. I don't think anyone's heart tells them to try change a person. To some, they see it as a chance to find what they are missing. To others, they hear it as a "rational" thought process and they go out to try and change the world, or at least the little system they are involved in. They nail down the pegs and refuse to budge from their perch. Quite often, the flow of change leaves them marooned in a stagnant little section of life and they wonder where they lost it all. People come out of long, stern relationships wondering why everyone else has moved on and done other things. It's hard to see out a window that has only one clean spot in it.

There is quite a lot I could say about change really. I write it as it occurs to me, basically. One thing I do know quite well about it though is I may feel differently about this blog as time wears on. I will stop short of regretting it though I think, because that's just how life goes. It changes. We change. Or age, our bodies change, as does our attitudes to certain things. That is why I will publish this blog. I will always appreciate why it was written in the first place.