Thursday, December 23, 2010

Hi, horse!

I have always started each of these blogs with one goal in mind...

Clarity. Peace of mind. And the likes.


If you were to look at these blogs as snapshots of what goes on inside my mind, then you wouldn't be far from worng. However, you do not see their raw state very often, so I still get the pleasure of concealing to a minor degree, some of the splintered thoughts, fragments of memories and shrapnel..of...ideas that I deem unworthy of the eyes of others, be it for posture, decency or minor paranoia. So they are spirited away to another location in order to keep 'em safe and out of harm's way. I'm not the malicious type, and I ain't about to start either.

You cannot think away the past, nor can you change it, no matter how hard you try. Even burying it in chemicals doesn't work. Observe the junky or alcoholic and you will see it's a painful daily process, often ending in tears. Torture, both physical and mental, are a bitter pill to swallow and I know that well. Could be a hunch, could be experience... just take my word for it for now.

See I have in great authority, that you cannot change how a person thinks, no matter how hard you try or no matter how much you want them to. I have witnessed this in my lifetime on numerous occasions while being bullied, peer-pressured or even through self-inflicted "regime change" for the sake of another's happiness. The key rule: Never sacrifice your own happiness. If someone doesn't know how to find it, point the way if you know, but don't insist it's the only way. Reminds me of a great metaphor from a great movie my friend mentioned the other day. "Like a finger pointing the way to the moon... don't concentrate on the finger or you will miss all the heavenly glory".

Kudos for reminding me of this wonderful phrase. You know who you are.

I read a great thing today. I often get confused as to whether or not I am the only person doomed to think so abstractly. It was from astrology, a practice I neither approve or decline in legitimacy. There's only so much you can rubbish once you realise you are on a wet magnetic ball hurtling through space. Anyway, It went like this:

"Why are they[Pisces] so indecisive? Simple. They think and analyze way too much. They have the tendency to consider [ten] alternatives before making a simple decision. Pisces are multi-faceted and it’s not uncommon for them to leave very different or even contradicting impressions to the people around them. That’s because Pisces will actually contemplate about the different personalities they portray to people from the other person’s viewpoint and manipulate that impression so that others don’t misunderstand their intentions"


"they [Pisces] typically have above-average tolerance, and others tend to take advantage of them because it’s so easy. Ironically, Pisces are well aware that they’re being taken advantage of and don’t mind it, because their focus is on happiness, not fairness and equality"

and also

"[Pisces believe] there is no absolute right or wrong in any matter. Instead of judging a situation, the first thing they do is to analyze it. Their goal is not to figure out whether anything was morally correct, but merely to understand why it happened the way it did for their own curiosity. If you were to tell a Pisces friend about a woman cheating on her fiancé with a married man with children, his or her instant reaction could be to question the reason behind her cheating and the nature of her relationships rather than immediately reprimanding or labelling that woman"

and finally

"Their tendency to over-analyze is just a very practical way of utilizing their receptiveness and acute sensitivity, which allow them to reflect on how others think through their own thoughts and emotions. Nobody can outsmart the Pisces in understanding human nature, emotions and relationships"

The reason I have included this tl;dr is because it hits the nail right on the head, no question, as to exactly how I am when it comes to problem solving and life, in general. I don't question another's belief systems, rather, I just try understand them albeit, very intimately. Guess I could make a good spy.

Through all these years of melding, shifting and shaping, I just cannot find my way to be another person, no matter what kind of point of view they may have and no matter how much I respect them or the person who holds 'em. The problem (as some might call it) is that I personally lack any kind of critical nature to discriminate, unless it's inhumane (if someone is being wronfully abused, neglected, tortured etc etc) so usually, bully, peer, friend, rival or other, I end up having tremendous amounts of respect for. What a loser huh?

So I write this bullshit you read so as better to understand the critics who "review" them and usually, it's the critic who inspires it so it becomes a circular thing. It's kinda nice to be a conduit rather than an agressor, I feel. That is not to say I am any better to those I would consider agressors or even the opposite, actually.

How do arguments surface? Difference of opinion. How do they perpetuate? By one side pain-stakingly trying to convert the other side to it's ways or point of view. It sure is funny to watch, but not when you're on each side, unfortunately. That is not to say I'm a spineless neuteral party though. Nah, i suck at that these days. Getting way too old now and too brash to sit and be told how it's done. It's because of this one side/other side... you're wrong/I'm right... always always trying to take advantage, to convert, to support or encourage their argument. So much is lost, so much useful data, so much knowledge all to dictate right from wrong. A subject that is purely relative or ceded to authority, rather than virtue and according to both sides of any argument, seemingly, both sides are wrong. I happen to respect both sides, no matter how gritty. Just doesn't mean I have to agree, mind you. I don't point the finger, honestly. I try to understand the reader, the individual. I allow the reader to point it at me or at themselves. If the glove fits, wear it, criticise. I may be wrong, I may be right and you might hate it. Doesn't matter. It all amounts to something fantastic as far as I'm concerned. You cannot change a person by criticism alone. they have to want to.

After all, you can bring a horse to water... blah blah blah blah blah blah!

Incidentally, if you're interested in the astrology link, I'll show you the way to the site but it will be the Pisces page. I'm sure you can find your own sign handy enough.


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